Goodbye Buddy

I've had a rough couple of days. As you may recall, I sent Buddy to my brother and sister-in-law's to be trained. I invested a lot of hope in this effort. He came home yesterday. He and I did fairly well when everyone was here, but when they left, Buddy went back to his old behaviors and didn't mind me. If it was anyone's, it was my failing. I don't have the temperament to keep a large dog in check...at least I don't have the temperament to keep a large dog in check and continue to love him.

Today, after many many tears, I decided to give him up. This afternoon, I surrendered him to the Humane Society. I'm certain they'll find a better home for him. I will think of him fondly running around on a farm with kids somewhere.

Before we took him away, Buddy and I had a few minutes like those when he was little. He slurped my face and I scratched him behind the ears, and stroked those lovely satiny ears.

I would have loved to have kept him if I could have controlled him. Even though it didn't last, I loved him intensely and if dogs can love, I believe he loved me. My life was enriched by him, and although I know he'll be better off, I will miss him.